“Motivational” speeches. Self-absorbed social media posts. Politicians you can’t trust. It seems they’re everywhere.
Because of this, I’ve come to the conclusion I may have it all wrong. Perhaps we need to alienate our audiences. That’s what many presenters today.
With this in mind, here are 7 Top Tips to Alienate Your Audience:
1. Give Speeches in the Same Tone of Voice Throughout.
Audience love when you constantly shout at them – like a politician. They also enjoy a dry, monotone delivery. Each of these styles engages them. They make you likable.
Monotone is especially beneficial when reading your text. It is also impactful immediately after your audience has eaten lunch.
2. Stalk the Speaking Area Like a Caged Lion.
Audiences love speakers who walk around with no purpose. They love the distraction of extraneous movements. This keeps them from hearing your message.
It guarantees that they’ll feel exhausted when you finish speaking. They won’t remember anything you said.
3. Throw as Many Ideas as Possible Into Your Speeches.
Today’s audiences aren’t bombarded with enough information. The internet doesn’t provide enough. They especially crave more statistics and numbers. They want you to add to the confusion they’re feeling about your topic.
It’s helpful if you present this multitude of information in long, run-on sentences. It goes without saying that you do this with as many PowerPoint slides as possible. Remember to read those slides. People love when you read to them in a speech.
4. Don’t Offer a Fresh Perspective.
Audiences enjoy clichéd and trite ideas they’ve been listening to for years. This is especially true with quotes. Use the same ones that every other speaker uses. This will enable you to sound like everyone else.
Audiences don’t need fresh insight nor new ways to approach their problems. Most of their problems have been solved,. They’re listen to you only for entertainment purposes.
5. Don’t Tell Stories.
These can create an emotional connection. They also give people a much better understanding of your topic in a short amount of time. People today don’t want you to get to the point.
They have plenty of time to hear you pontificate. They know how hard you worked to prepare your fact-laden speech.
6. Talk as Fast as Possible.
There is so much information available today. People need to take everything in as fast as possible. Be like a teenager. Don’t take a breath. Talk! Talk! Talk!
Don’t allow them to laugh after humorous lines. Avoid giving them time to feel the impact of your stories. Don’t pause so they can consider the implication of your points to their lives.
Silence will only increase your odds of connecting with them.
7. Use Rehearsed Gestures.
Act like you’re in a stage play. The more dramatic the better. People today can’t get enough of superficial communication. They don’t want authenticity or reality from their speakers. They want to hear yet another person who is there only for the attention. They do not crave human connection.
Please accept this blog post for it’s intended spirit. If you’re reading this, chances are you don’t want to be one of the speakers discussed above.
This is just a reminder. There are so many people – speakers, leaders, celebrities – who DO present like this. Follow a few simple rules. Practice until they’re natural. Then, you will stand out from the crowd of self-absorbed and ineffective presenters.
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