Stuck in a Distracting Thought
Lisa was telling a captivating story to our coaching group. And it had my full attention. Sheโd lost a large amount of weight, over 80 pounds.
One part of her story involved being on a weight-loss TV show. One of the hosts was John Cena.
She shared this part of her story and then moved on to the next vignette. We stopped her.
โLisa, imagine youโre in the audience and you heard that reference to John Cena, and donโt know who he is.โ
What would you do?
She thought for a moment and said, โI guess Iโd start wondering, who did she say? John who?
โIโd be distracted. I probably wouldnโt hear the next thing the speaker said.โ
Exactly!
Lisa had committed one of the most common storytelling mistakes I see. She made the assumption everyone in her audience was familiar with her references.
She was suffering fromโฆ
The Curse of Knowledge
I first read about this concept in the book, โMade to Stickโ by Dan and Chip Heath.
It refers to the mindset of being so familiar with your topic you forget what itโs like NOT to know it. And this creates a disconnect with your audience.
When you make a reference your audience isnโt familiar with, they immediately stop listening to you. Instead, these kinds of thoughts run their heads:
John who?
Seener?
Seeger?
Or, theyโll thinkโฆ
John Cenaโฆ. John Cena.
Isnโt he an entertainer?
Football player?
Wrestling?โ
Or, โIsnโt he that actor guy?โ
Whatever theyโre thinking, youโre in trouble. The people distracted by this reference are not listening to you. Youโve moved on but theyโre โlost in thoughtโ and not hearing you.
You know what this means for the rest of your speech, right?

Itโs as if you were driving down the highway with them, but suddenly took a side road thatโs not on any map or GPS, then pushed them out of the car to fend for themselves, and got back on the highway by yourself.
A missed opportunity to make a lasting impression
How do you solve this problem?
Itโs actually easy.
In the John Cena example above, Lisa could have set up the reference like this:
โOne of the stars of the show was former wrestler turned actor John Cena. Heโd overcome his own weight challenges and wants to help others do the same.โ
Thatโs it! Two brief sentences to give context to her reference.
Fortunately, Lisa is coachable and willing to change to improve her message. She now uses a similar short description to introduce John Cena. The audience has context, stays focused, and is ready to hear what she says next.
Do you want to keep your audienceโs attention?
Avoid the Curse of Knowledge.
Review your speeches and stories and ask others for their input. Whatโs confusing? Which references are you unfamiliar with?
With this feedback, youโll have a message that creates curiosity, stirs their imagination, and keeps their interest from start to finish.
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Michaelโs mission is to help leaders, managers and sales professionals communicate with more confidence, impact, and influence. This passion is born from his own communication difficulties early in his career.
Fortunately, he discovered that public speaking is like riding a bike, swimming or driving a car - itโs a learnable skill. Once he discovered this โsecretโ he became a voracious student of the craft. He took courses, studied some of the worldโs best speakers and storytellers and continues to study presentation and business storytelling skills.
He is hired by companies and organizations, leaders, managers and sales professionals, and TEDx speakers to help them become more confident, impactful and influential communicators.

