Speaking Lessons From a Success Expert
Iโm a big fan of Darren Hardy.
Heโs the former editor of SUCCESS magazine. He isย a modern-day expert on success. Heโs interviewed and studied many of the worldโs most successful people.
With such a background, youโd expect that Darren has a unique perspective on the topic of success.
THESE People Can Help Me With Speaking?
In a recent video he introduced these quotes that surprised me because they donโt talk about success:
โWhen Iโm scheduled to speak to any size audience – I wake up twice a month in a cold sweat, panicked 
theyโll find him out Iโm a fraud.โ
โI have varying degrees of confidence and self-loathing. I often doubt my talent and fear theyโre going to find out that I donโt know what Iโm doingโ
โI still doubt myself EVERY SINGLE DAY. What people believe is my self-confidence is actually my reaction to fear.โ
One other woman who said:
โTheyโre going to find out now. Iโve run a game on everybody. And theyโre going to find me outโ
Theseย individuals must be failures! People you’ve never heard of. Darren must be sharing these as examples of how NOT to think, right?
How Can a Negative Mindset Help Your Speaking?
Well, actually, you havenโt heard of the first one because he asked to remain anonymous. His reasons make good business sense. But, he is the CEO of a $4 billion multinational corporation. He started in the mailroom and rose to the top position. His company weathered the Great Recession of 2008.ย It thrived while most of his competitors were wiped out.
Quite a success. But, when he has to give speeches, he doesn’t feel that way. As he says, “When I have to speak to any size audience โ whether 3 or 30,000 โ I wake up twice a month in a cold sweat, panicked theyโll find him out Iโm a fraud.โ
You do know the other three people:
Meryl Streep, the most honored actor of all time with 3 Academy Awards and 20 total nominations. She has said:
โI have varying degrees of confidence and self-loathing. I often doubt my talent and fear theyโre going to find out that I donโt know what Iโm doingโ
Will Smith, the accomplished actor, musician, and producer, said:
โI still doubt myself EVERY SINGLE DAY. What people believe is my self-confidence is actually my reaction to fear.โ
Maya Angelou, famed poet and civil rights activist, said:
โTheyโre going to find out now. Iโve run a game on everybody. And theyโre going to find me outโ
The Syndrome That We All Experience
Successful people in their chosen fields and they feel this way?
The reality is, theyโre no different than you or me. They experience the โImposter Syndrome.โ
You may not be familiar with this. Itโs defined as a psychological pattern in which people doubt their accomplishments. They have a persistent fear of being exposed as a โfraud.”
Hereโs an interesting discovery made by Darren Hardy:
The higher your level of accomplishment, the more vulnerable you are to the Imposter Syndrome.
ย As Darren says, “The higher you go, the more human you become.โ
What does this have to do with speaking and business storytelling?
How Speaking Makes You Vulnerable to This Syndrome
Speaking is one of the most intimidating and scary experiences many people face. In fact, some research shows that itโs normal — itโs human — to experience these fears. Accomplished individuals feel it, sometimes every day.
Many people I’ve worked with have had the thought, “Why did they choose me? I’m sure there are more accomplished people who could be speaking.” Or, some variation of those thoughts.
These thoughts may pop into your head, and that’s OK. It’s common.
Whatโs not OK is allowing these feelings to debilitate you, or keep you from taking action. What the super-achievers do is use those feelings to push them.
To quote Darren Hardy, โHumans are designed to THRIVE on pressure. Use that internal pressure to push you to action.โ
So, the next time you’re preparing to speak, and you feel anxiety rising in your chest or your throat, and your heartย is beating faster, and your breathing quickens, remind yourself:
โIโm normal. Itโs OK to feel this way.โ
Remind yourself that many successful people feel the same way.
Then, remember why youโre there to speak. For the audience, who needs the message you came to share.
Do this, and you wonโt feel like an imposter, because youโre not one.
RECOMMENDED RESOURCE
If youโre interested in picking up secrets of the super successful, I highly recommend Darrenโs video series, Darren Daily, To get your daily dose of his wisdom, visit:
http://dd.darrenhardy.com/